Okay, so I’m trying something new.  I get jokes from clients all the time – I’m sure you do too.  Usually I laugh and delete.   Instead of forwarding the ones that are especially crude and thus ridiculously funny, I’m going to put them here – minus the foul language — well, at least most of the time.

As I Mature I’ve Learned…

…that you can’t make someone love you.  All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

…that no matter how much you care some people are just complete jerks, rude, obnoxious, ungrateful – actually it doesn’t say any of that.  That’s my creative license.

…it takes years to build trust and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

…you shouldn’t compare yourself to others.  They’re more screwed up than you think.

…you can get by on charm for about five minutes.  After that you’d better have big — let’s just say something more.

…we are responsible for our actions, unless you’re a celebrity.

…you can keep vomiting long after you’re finished.

…the people you care about most in life are taken too soon and the less important ones never go away.

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